Let Go
by Katia-chan
Summary: A fic to the cd Let Go by Avril Lavigne, Bakura is his usual cruel and evil and controling self, and Ryou's had enough, who will win the battle for control? and can Ryou really handle independence? rr Discontinued for now
1. Losing my grip

Losing My Grip  
  
A/N: ok, this was destine for a fic of mine, a dark and angsty fic, so I'm fulfilling destiny. It took me about three days to get an idea, my muses have been slacking but now I've got one, it's not one of my best ideas but It'll do.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh, though I wish I did, because then I would own Bakura!!! But as I don't I will make myself content with huggling him and telling you that I don't own this song either. It's owned by Avril Lavigne, so if I get sued for claiming ownership then, well, I didn't claim it! So don't sue me! I'm broke!  
  
Ryou's p.o.v  
  
I crouched down. Maybe if I wasn't seen by him he wouldn't hurt me. Yet, something in me told me to stand up, make him see you. I wanted him so much, but all he could do was hurt me. Oh how I wanted to love him. He hurt me every day, but I got a strange feeling when I looked into his face. It was like he didn't see me. He struck me in places he knew were numb, like my hand. He'd once stepped on that and it had limited feeling now. It confused me. I couldn't tell who he saw when he hit me. I angered him somehow, and it hurt me to see him like this. A madman, a shell of his former and beautiful self. An angry person, incapable of loving anyone. I wanted to love him so much, but even when he wasn't hitting or hurting me he didn't seem to see me. He spoke hateful words to me every day.  
  
"Get up you weakling! Stop crying!" I pulled myself off the floor and slowly retreated towards my room.  
  
"You are so stupid!" he lashed at me and as his hand connected with my cheek I felt a ring he wears cut into my skin. The blood flowed down, face wounds bleed the worst. Oh god! I wanted him so badly, wanted his love, his protection against the world, but I needed protection from him first. He certainly knew how to hurt me.  
  
*Are you aware of how you make me feel, baby  
  
Right now I feel invisible to you  
  
Like I'm not real*  
  
Bakura's p.o.v  
  
God! Why am I doing this? It hurts me as much as it must hurt him, but I can't stop. It's not Ryou. I love that little tenshi. It's me, the insults, the pain, that's for me. I am such a chicken, a weakling. I can't stand the pain on myself, so I inflict it on him. Maybe if I change his own appearance I won't see myself in him so much. Slowly it seems to work, scars disfigure his face but it's like scratching a beautiful painting. It makes me feel worse and then I hate myself and I want to hurt myself, but I won't do that. It's not my fault! I stepped towards him as he backed away, covering the fresh flow of blood down his face with a shaking hand. "Stand still," I command him.  
  
He obey's and I feel a quick flash of pride, he is mine to control, I can change him as much as I want. I kick out at his shin, miss and hit his knee and he crumples to the floor and suddenly I can't bare it, what is wrong with me, I am a tomb robber, I have no feelings for anyone, not even him. I reach down; take his arm to help him up. I may be losing my mind but for this moment, for this tiny space in time I think it's possible that I have a heart.  
  
As my fingers close around his arm, as gently as I can because I'm shaking so badly, he begins to shake. I brushed a strand of hair away from the cut and he draws back. I try to pull him to his feet but his eyes go wide and he wrenches out of my grasp.  
  
*Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you  
  
Why'd you turn away  
  
Here's what I have to say  
  
I was left to cry there  
  
Waiting outside there  
  
burning with a lost stare*  
  
That does it, I am back to my normal self, the pity is gone, and I can hurt him now. I celebrate my new power by kicking him into the wall where he stays. If he won't take me then I feel no pity, I can't waste my time with someone like him. I look down at him. "speak baka," He stares at me, "didn't you hear me, speak,"  
  
"wha, what do you want me to say?"  
  
"I don't care, tell me what you think of me, of this," I knew I was asking for a reason to get mad because I still had a lot of energy but no reason to let it fly. I am nothing if not logical, maybe in a twisted sort of way. I don't force myself to act if there is no thought behind it. I won't hurt him unless I feel angry, hurt or afraid, he cannot see weakness. A punch is a good way to hide my shaking hands. I need a reason, if only a small one to hurt him, the realization that he was so much, but so different from me had intrigued me. It was some time ago when I stopped hurting myself and turned to him. The same effect except that I didn't feel it. He seemed puzzled by this, confused and hurt. Now he cowered at my feet, and I was giving myself reasons to be angry.  
  
"I. I. I don't know,"  
  
"Yes you do, but since you will not answer me I shall have to punish you, you do not disobey me," there, that got him talking. Unfortunately, that's all it is, talking, an empty rambling, just to keep me from hurting him, I would like to. I would like to hurt him, but I won't. Instead I shut him up with a warning finger put harshly down on his mouth.  
  
"silence, you have nothing to say, you're just afraid, go away now, I have no use for you at the present moment," He jumps to his feet and runs out of the room and I watch him with grim satisfaction, I can make him do what I want him to, when I want him to, but why did I feel a stab of guilt? This is so unlike me. My emotions are trying to get the better of me, why does he have to look so damn much like me. If he were different I could content myself with being simply manipulative and a little harsh, but since he provides a scapegoat for my pain he gets the worst of it.  
  
I followed him into his room where I found him curled up on the bed, using a sheet to stop the blood from his face from spreading. I kept silent so he wouldn't notice me and watched him. He wasn't crying and I could see the reflection of his face in the mirror when he got up to look at his cut. The look was one I wouldn't forget, pain and even, maybe a little anger, indignation. I made myself visible in the mirror and I new he saw me because his jaw tightened but he seemed to think if I thought that he hadn't noticed me I'd go away and leave him alone for a while. Well, I will, but he will pay, he should be my hikari. I should be able to use him for what ever I want, but there's something wasted about him. His usefulness is fading as he becomes oblivious to my torment, and it makes me mad. I need him to fear me with fresh terror; my lust for power isn't satisfied, since there is a zombiish air about his fear. Why do I even care about the brat. I should just steal his ring, give it to someone else and get rid of him.  
  
*Why should I care  
  
You weren't there when I was scared  
  
I was so alone  
  
You, you need to listen  
  
I'm starting to trip  
  
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone*  
  
Ryou's p.o.v.  
  
I studied the long gash in my cheek and then noticed him in the doorway, reflected next to me. My jaw tightened but I ignored him, if I didn't talk to him maybe he'd leave me alone. I shook at the murderous look on his face as he turned away, but I was angry too. I thought I knew why he hurt me. He probably had someone, perhaps a lover back in ancient Egypt, though I found it hard to imagine, who looked like me and hurt him. I was just the shadow of someone he was angry at, and for some reason it really made me mad. I was just a past person shaped punching bag. It made all the pain seem useless and wasted. If that's all it was then I was suffering for nothing, except his self-satisfaction, but that shouldn't have surprised me, that was all he cared about, himself. I swear, every time he hits me I don't even think he sees me. His eyes are filled with hatred, but he never meets mine, and his look makes it appear that he was searching for something, and this pissed me off. If I was going to suffer I wanted it to be for me, not for someone else. I poked angrily at the cut and scowled as more blood ran down my cheek. It wasn't blood that used to be on my cheek, Bakura had used to care for me. I remembered those days, used them to keep myself sane. He had been, almost kind, a little psychotic, a little sadistic but he'd been kind. I think he had a power trip after those days. He must've seen me becoming too comfortable. He had to remind me who was boss, but the power trip hadn't ended. He had stayed the same and those days were forgotten. I missed them. He thought I was stupid, that I was to innocent to understand his need for power. I understood, and I had the same need myself. It wasn't as strong, or neurotic, but it was my own need for control. I didn't like to rely on others; I liked to be in control of my own destiny. I hated the power he had over me, but I was too scared to let my disgust show. He had acted crazy before and it had almost gotten my friends and I killed. The power surge had taken over in that instant, in the duel where I was the change of heart card. I didn't want him to control our fate, so I had acted. Probably saved all our lives, but paid dearly for it, but for that brief moment I had control. I had, rather frighteningly, liked it. But now here I was, he was in control again and I was his punching bag to relieve himself of all his fury. And it was all wasted  
  
*Am I just someone you place beside you  
  
To take somebody's place  
  
When you turn around do you recognize my face  
  
You used to love me you used to hug me  
  
But now that's not the case  
  
Everything is not ok  
  
I was left to cry there  
  
Waiting outside there  
  
Burning with the lost stare*  
  
Bakura's p.o.v  
  
I slammed into the kitchen and went to the sink to wash Ryou's blood off my hands. Unfortunately for both of us when I reached in I had my first meeting with the live lobster Ryou had been planning to cook. "Ahh!" I withdrew my hand from the sink and sent the despicable creature spinning across the kitchen where it's shell cracked satisfyingly. I walked slowly and cautiously over to it and poked it with a knife that I'd found on the counter. It didn't move and I was pleased. I picked it up and scowled at it as it slightly twitched. "You bastard," I growled at it. The stupid pink lump seemed to glare at me and I dropped it into the cooking pot on the counter, which had no water in it as of yet. Then I peered warily over the edge of the sink before putting my hands in again. The lobster had taken a nice chunk out of my finger and I was fairly pissed. I washed my hand, all the while muttering curses at the lobster.  
  
Ryou's P.O.V.  
  
I finished cleaning the cut and had just put down the disinfectant when I heard a scream from Bakura. I assumed that it was just one of his little things that he did when he was pissed, but when I heard more muttering I sneaked to the kitchen where I found him prodding my lobster with a long and rather frightening looking knife. I watched as he picked it up gingerly and dropped it into an empty pot and continue to wash his hands, after looking into the sink with a suspicious look which almost made me laugh. I decided against it because he looked like he would bite off my head if I did, so as quietly as I could I snuck back to my room.  
  
Bakura's P.O.V  
  
The last of the blood was off my hands when I walked into the living room. Ryou's father wasn't home and I liked it this way. Less explaining and excuses had to be done and told and I could make a mess in my tirades without arousing suspicion. I sat on the couch and brooded about my hikari. I needed to make him respect me, not that it mattered, but if he respected me then bending him would be that much easier. I needed to show him that how comfortable he was wasn't the permanent state of things. I would have to do something truly awful to make him feel it, feel that I was in charge. I decided to start with his friends. I had used Ryou to get at them once before, and if the little shit hadn't betrayed me then I think I would have had the puzzle and revenge for the influence they had had on Ryou. "Ryou!" I called and heard him sigh from the next room and come out slowly, looking nervous, good. Nervous was how I liked him.  
  
"Yes Bakura-sama?"  
  
"We, my dear hikari," he shivered and I smiled sweetly at him, "have some business to attend to, can you guess what it is?"  
  
"No," I shook my head sadly  
  
"What is my main goal in life hikari?"  
  
"World domination," he muttered and I was slightly surprised at the resentment in his voice. Normally I wouldn't have accepted that but I was in a hurry and for the sake of time I would let it go.  
  
"Right, but what do I need to get what I want?" he thought for a second,  
  
"The millennium items?"  
  
"Very good, but which one of these do I want the most?"  
  
"The puzzle," he said, making sure that his eyes didn't meet mine.  
  
"Good, and I need your body, so I will be using it for a while, just thought I'd let you know,"  
  
Ryou's P.O.V.  
  
"And what do I need to get what I want?" I shivered inside, I knew but I pretended to think, just to hide the fury that popped up unexpectedly. Hadn't he had enough of that yet?  
  
"The millennium items?" I asked, trying to sound stupid.  
  
"Very good, and which of these do I want the most?" damn, he was still on that.  
  
"The puzzle," I was sick of that. I was ready to kill him and cry at the same time because I knew that my friends would be hurt. His next words came to me like an expected slap in the face.  
  
"Good, and I will be using your body for a while, just thought I'd let you know," I hated it when he did that, and this time he was going to know how much I detested being his shell, just so he didn't' have to go as himself.  
  
"No," I was defending my friends and hoped they would appreciate it, because I think he's about to kill me, but what does it matter, they'll be safe.  
  
*Why should I care  
  
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared  
  
I was so alone  
  
You, you need to listen  
  
I'm starting to trip  
  
I'm losing my grip  
  
And I'm in this thing alone*  
  
"No?" he looked outraged. "How dare you say no to me! I am your master,"  
  
"No, You are my other half! We are one!" I was so sick of being controlled, I think I finally snapped.  
  
"We are not one! I am immortal and strong, you are weak, and we are not equal!" I was ready to strangle him with my own hands.  
  
"Bakura! Why can't you see that we are! We are the same person," he was mad now, I could read his face like a book and I read murder murder murder all over it.  
  
"I am not like you!"  
  
"If you would look past your stubbornness you could see that you are!" I was begging him now, pleading for equalness, only then could it go back to the way it was. I needed to make him understand, it was necessary for our continued joint existence. To save my life I had to make him realize that we were equal and one in the same.  
  
*Crying out loud  
  
I'm crying out loud  
  
Crying out loud  
  
I'm crying out loud*  
  
Bakura's P.O.V.  
  
He thought we were equal! How could he think that, and how dare he defy me. This is going to far, but I'm too mad to hit him.  
  
"If you would look past your stubbornness you could see that you are!" why was he trying, it was pointless. He was not my equal but my lesser. He had not under took the hardships of Egypt and so couldn't understand, and he was not thinking straight. What was he thinking?  
  
"We are not equals!" I repeated.  
  
*Open your eyes  
  
Open up wide  
  
Why should I care  
  
You weren't there, when I was scared  
  
And I was so alone  
  
Why should I care  
  
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared  
  
And I was so alone*  
  
Ryou's P.O.V.  
  
"This is it Bakura!" I screamed. The life I had been leading had finally caught up to me. I was tired of being a puppet.  
  
"Are you threatening me?" Threatening him? I guess I was, but against what. I had to open my mouth and spill all before he got his mind back and started to go on with the business of knocking me senseless.  
  
"No! I'm trying to make you understand! I'm sick of being ruled and unless I can become at least more of your equal I'm not staying!" there, I had said it. Now, how would he respond. What would he say.  
  
"I don't care if you leave, but you are my hikari, and you should listen to me! I am your master! You have no idea what kind of hell I can put you through!" he didn't think this was hell?  
  
"I don't care, you can try it! You have never been there when I needed you, and I don't care what you try to do to me, because I am leaving, I can't take this any more!" He looked slightly stunned as I grabbed my bag and headed towards the door. Thankfully he was to stunned to move.  
  
*Why should I care  
  
You weren't there when I was scared  
  
I was so alone  
  
Why should I care  
  
If you don't care then I don't care  
  
We're not going anywhere  
  
Why should I care  
  
you weren't there when I was scared  
  
I was so alone  
  
Why should I care  
  
If you don't care then I don't care  
  
We're not going anywhere*  
  
Bakura's P.O.V.  
  
He was leaving, just like that. I had to stop him. He couldn't disobey me, could he? I wanted to draw him back, but at the same time I understood. I had seen something in him that wasn't normal. My own power lust was reflected in those burning chocolate eyes. I knew if he stayed that we would never get anywhere, we would just keep crashing into each other. I would get in his way, which I didn't care about, and he would get in mine, because now that he had done it once the power was still there. He wouldn't go back to being the giving little hikari anymore. I knew he was his own person, but it was more a curiosity that kept me in my seat as he slammed the door with his bag over his shoulder. I had wondered for a moment if he wouldn't chicken out and crawl back, looking for acceptance and forgiveness. If he had done this I would have beaten him within an inch of his life, but he kept going. Strangely, I felt more respect then ever because he didn't look back. He was right, we couldn't co-exist. It was then that I realized how much I was going to miss him. No matter how weak, he was still my hikari, and I would miss him. But, if he wanted to leave then who was I to stand in his way. He would be one less problem to worry about, I wouldn't have to look at myself anymore, and could ignore the faults that nagged at me subconsciously. It was good he was gone, and I could proceed with my original plan with nothing in my way. I liked it this way, or at least, I think I do.  
  
*why should I care  
  
cuz you weren't there when I was scared  
  
I was so alone  
  
Why should I care  
  
If you don't care then I don't care  
  
We're not going anywhere*  
  
A/N: ok, that turned out weirder then I expected, sorry for all the pov changes. It was sort of necessary to keep the story going, but I want you to tell me what you think, should I make this into an entire cd fic, do a chapter for each song, or would you rather I keep it like this? I want to know what you think, should I continue, or leave well enough alone Tell me, and either way, REVIEW!! And all flames will be as I have said, given to Bakura, and that is very dangerous.  
  
Ttfn  
  
Katia 


	2. Complicated

Complicated  
  
A/N: well, there were a few people who wanted me to continue, so I am. Thanks to 9tails122 and Yami's tenshi for reviewing! It meant so much to me! *gives Bakura plushies to 9t and YT* well, I realized that I forgot to do the disclaimer, so my dear darling muse Bakura is going to do it.  
  
Bakura: why me! Why do you ALWAYS do that to me!  
  
Because, you torment my favorite tenshi  
  
Ryou: I'm her favorite tenshi!!  
  
Um...did you have sugar?  
  
Ryou: um, no?  
  
Ah, I see, well, then you can do the disclaimer, since Bakura is being a poop  
  
Bakura: poop? Is that the best you can come up with?  
  
In a pg13 rated fic, yes  
  
Ryou: Katia doesn't own Yu-gi-oh, and she doesn't own me or Bakura, and, I think that is probably a pretty good idea  
  
And what is that supposed to mean?  
  
Ryou: absolutely nothing  
  
Riiight, well, it's time to start the fic, and by the way, take special care, Ryou is a potty mouth in this chapter!  
  
Ryou: me?  
  
Yes, so don't say I didn't warn you. Also, I'm posting this really fast after I wrote it, just to get this story properly started, so there will be a bunch of errors, but nothing to bad. If I get flamed for my spelling I will personally make the flamer wish that they had run out of matches, so, if you no flame you no get chewed out, if you flame, you WILL get the chewing out of your life! Once the story is more on it's way I'll correct these and repost this chapter. So, Enjoy and leave me reviews!  
  
(-(-(-(-(-(-(-  
  
It had been three days, three days since Ryou had left me sitting in the livingroom. I had expected him back by now. My controlling nature told me that he had to come back, but deep in theat little part of your mind that doesn't lie, I knew he wouldn't be back for a long time, if at all. The house seemed to large and I was relieved for a little while to find that Ryou's father would be gone for another month, and happier to find money enclosed, but all in all it had been a pretty depressing three days. With nothing to take out my rage on I turned to long energetic walks, and when that failed kicking a little furnature around always helped me to relieve some of my stress. When the third day ended however, I thought I might want to look for my hikari, and I had to start in the most hated source, the pharaoh and his light.  
  
I hated the thought of calling and telling the pharaoh that the great thief had lost his light, but what could I do. I at least had to know where he was, just for my own issues. I was going to call him, but he called me first, but he wasn't happy with me at all. I answered the phone, putting on my best Ryou voice.  
  
"hello, Bakura residence,"  
  
"is that you tomb robber?" I heard the pharaoh's voice on the other line and as such, made my own as sweet as possible.  
  
"no, I think you're mistaken, this is Ryou,"  
  
"I think not, spill Bakura," I laughed maliciously to myself and confessed.  
  
"oh, so the great pharaoh figured out my little trick did he? How clever he is,"  
  
"I do not have time for this," I was pleased with how irritated he sounded.  
  
"well, then what do you want, I don't have all day, you know, taking over the world's a full time task," "I neeed to know what the hell you did with your hikari, Yugi hasn't seen him for four days, and we know you had something to do with it," I was a little shocked, they were wondering? Well, it wouldn't surprise me, with how close their "friendships" were.  
  
"I haven't seen him for three oh great and mighty Pharaoh,"  
  
"you expect me to believe that?" "well, believe what ever you want, because he's not here, he left three days ago and he hasn't been back since," there was a silence on the end of the line.  
  
"well, we're going to look for him, if we find him we'll let you know,"  
  
"right, well, I have things to do, good bye," and I slammed down the phone. That had been good, now I didn't have to ask the pharaoh about my light and have him mock me. I still decided to go out and look, just to set myself at ease. I slipped into my jacket and, using the powers of the ring, began to search for him.  
  
I had been walking around the city for about 2 hours and was getting ready to call it quits when at last the thing I had been waiting for happened, the ring began to glow. That meant only one thing, that my hikari was near. I hurried towards where it pointed, turned a corner and saw my hikari, but I didn't like what I saw.  
  
Ryou was standing in front of a rundown apartment building, and he was a mess. His normally smooth white hair was tangled and dirty, his face was a mess with dirt and a little of what I feared was blood. He was wearing the same clothes and they were torn. He stood in a crowd of people who looked in about the same state. I couldn't believe it, my innocent little hikari, in the slums of town? And unless my eyes were mistaking me, he was smoking. I tried to restrain myself, but to see a possession in such disarray burned at me, and I felt the briefest twinge of guilt before my rage and slight concern took over.  
  
"Ryou! Wha the hell are you doing!" he spun around and apaun seing me his eyes narrowed.  
  
"what are you doing here?" he hissed at me, and I was stunned by the hate in his voice.  
  
"I could ask the same of you," I retorted with almost the same venim in my own voice.  
  
"I'm living here, now what do you want?"  
  
"little trashy for you isn't it?" he glared.  
  
"It's what I can afford, and at least I'm living on my own," I could see an anger I'd never seen there before.  
  
"well, why don't you come home and get back to your life as normal."  
  
"life as normal!" he was now screaming at me and I couldn't see Ryou in him anymore. "I am happy here, I like it and it's a pretty fucking nice place to live, I can do whatever I want, and I will not come back home to see you or anybody!" I stared at him, shocked. This wasn't Ryou at all.  
  
"Ryou, what's wrong with you?"  
  
"nothing, I'm finally free, and don't call me Ryou anymore, it's Merotu," I scoffed at the name and his anger flared.  
  
"Merotu? What the hell kind of a name is that?" He looked like he was ready to hit me.  
  
"it's my name you fucking bastard, so don't you fucking forget it!" I stared at him, mouth open.  
  
"what are you doing Ry...I mean, Merotu?"  
  
"it's none of your fucking business!" this was angry, I had never seen him this angry. He wasn't afraid, he was juwst majorly pissed. Then a boy walked over to the both of them and studied both. Ryou with his dirty appearance and me with jmy clean one, and our similarities, but he sneered at me.  
  
"hey Merotu, who the hell is this?" Ryou's angerseemed to contain itself.  
  
"oh this? This is an old, um, my brother," I stared at him but for once I paid attention to the glare he sent me.  
  
"brother huh? Is he causing trouble?" I smirked and Ryou got red.  
  
"yes, and I'm telling him, go away, so, get out of here Bakura,"  
  
"I am not leaving you here," He stood up taller.  
  
"you are not in control of me! You fucking bastard!" He took a step towards me, along with the other boy.  
  
*chill out, what cha yellin for  
  
lay back it's all been done before  
  
and if you would only let it be  
  
you would see*  
  
"hey dude, you'd better get out of here, we don't like people who get in our territory," growled the boy. I almost smiled, thinking of the decoration he'd add to the shadow realm, but for the sake of my purpose I held it in.  
  
"and what are you going to do about it? Hmmm?" I stepped towards Ryou who, despitre his new found tough guy appearance shrank back. The bigger boy stepped between us, blocking Ryou from my view.  
  
"get the hell away from Kmerotu, he's our guest, and you can just take your sorry ass out of here," I took another step.  
  
"and, if I don't?"  
  
"then you'll have the shit beaten out of you," I couldn't believe my ears. My little Ryou, hanging out with people like this? What was he doing, and his whole attitude was changed. He was truly Merotu.  
  
"well, I need to talk to Ryou," I demanded, putting a long drawl on the name.  
  
"that's not Ryou, it's Morotu,"  
  
"It's ryou, and if you want to be assured,"  
  
"Bakura! Get away!" I'd had it. My power trip couldn't understand what he was doing and I was angry. I dove at him, trying o catch him and drag him away but the thug grabbed me around the waste. It was turning ugly fast as he punched at my face and I jabbed at his eyes. He knocked me hard on the side of the head and I drove my fist as hard as I could into his nose. This stunned him and I flung him over my shoulder onto the ground. Ryou had gotten lightly into the fight and being knocked down when his friend had fallen he stared up at me with cold fear and fury.  
  
"go away Bakura," he whispered. I lunged at him and he flinched.  
  
"I will go away, MOOROOOTTTUUU," I drawled the name out, "but I want you to know that this makes me sick," and with that I let go of the arm that I had grabbed and hurried away.  
  
That night, after I'd eaten something and broken a few chairs I sat downto tink. What was going on. He wasn't like himself. He'd gone off the deepend. I was worried, but curious as to if it was just me or if it was someone else. Then a cruel and rather nice plan popped into my head. I would send his friends to talk sense into him. If he rejected themthen I'd know and also get to see the pharaoh with his feathers ruffled, and if he welcomed themthen I'd know he wan't totally gone. So, using every bit of civility I had I called the Pharaoh.  
  
"hello?"  
  
"pharaoh, I need your help,"  
  
"the tomb robber needs my help?"  
  
"shut up almighty one, it's Ryou, he's lost it and your hikari needs to go and talk to him,"  
  
"and you can't do this yourself?"  
  
"cut the shit, you know he hates me and likes Yugi, just go, come over here tomorrow and I'll show you where he is,"  
  
"well,"  
  
"listen, just come,"  
  
"alright, but not for you, but for Yugi,"  
  
"wouldn't want it any other way oh mighty and wise one," I smirked as he slammed down the phone, it was so fun to torment him and make it so he couldn't refuse me.  
  
The next day they came over and I took them to the rundown apartment where I'd seen him. He was still there, in the middle of the same crowd, and I think, smoking the same cigarrett. Yugi looked very shocked and horrified and the pharaoh was frowning. We slowly approached Ryou and I held the pharaoh back.  
  
"you and I'll stay here, he won''t like seeing me very much and you need to let that little kid of yours do something for himself," Yami glared at me but subsided and we watched Yugi slowly and cautiously make his way through the crowd. It suddenly struck me just how short he was. Yugi slowly came up to Ryou and tapped the white haired teen on the shoulder. Ryou turned around and his eyes went wide with surprise.  
  
"Yugi, what are you doibng here?"  
  
"your Yami told me where you were and I was worried," Ryou glanced over Yugi's hair, spotted me and glared.  
  
"well, you shouldn't be here,"  
  
"Ryou, neither should you, what's happened to you?" Ryou's face filled with that same anger that I had seen and I began to wonder how wise this had beenl. I was cruel but I had no desire to scar one of my light's friemds for life, not using his ownfriend.  
  
"will you all stop trying to rule me!!!" Ryou screamed at Yugi, who shrank back, looking frightened.  
  
"I wasn't trying to rule you, I was just..."  
  
"no! stop it Yugi! don't try and give me any advice, because I'm tired of you all living through or for me!"  
  
"what happened to our friendship?  
  
"it's gone Yugi, you all controlled me to much,"  
  
"but we didn't,"  
  
"Yugi! I don't care, I'm not coming back, you can just try to get used to that, or is it to hard, do you need someone to help you?" Yugi looked shocked and really hurt.  
  
"Ryou!" Yugi grapped Ryou's sleeve with both hands and stared up at him, pleading.  
  
"Yugi! Stop it and go away! I have new friends now and they don't involve short migits who are too weak to do anything by themselves!" his hand went back and connected with Yugi's cheek, leaving a bright red mark. Tears filled Yugi's eyes as he stared up at his friend. Ryou pushed Yugi's hand off him and walked away, gesturing for the others to follow him, leaving Yugi standing in the middle of the street,with tears running down his cheeks. Ryou looked back at him one more time.  
  
"oh stop crying!, grow up Yugi!" and witht that he stormed away.  
  
*I like you the way you are  
  
when we're drivin in the car  
  
and you're talking to me one on one  
  
then you become  
  
somebody else,  
  
round everyone else  
  
watching your back  
  
like you can't relax  
  
you try to be cool  
  
you look like a fool to me*  
  
I felt Yami bristle under my fingers which held his arm tightly. I let him go and he hurried over to Yugi and pulled the boy close to him, comforting him as the tears ran down his face. I just watched in silence, to shocked to move. My Ryou, my sweet polite and kind little Ryou? Yugi was his best friend, he knew how sensitive he was about his hight, and he, like an ememy had used it against him. Ryou, who never said anything to offend anyone had left his friend crying in the middle of the street, and had actually hurt him. I didn't like the mutous, but at least I had some dignity. I couldn't help thinking that this was partially my fault. My training had had the effect I had originally hoped for, Ryou was strong, and he was different, but I really think he'd been hanging around me to much. That ugly hand mark reminded me of others that I had put on that other pale cheek, and I wondered if Ryou was paying me back through someone else's pain.  
  
Yami brought me back to life by tugging at my arm.  
  
"let's go," he muttered quietly. I nodded silently, not bothering with the usual frostiness. I knew my light had done enough to hurt them both for one night.  
  
Back at our house, I still think of it as Ryou's, Yami had stayed, I think I was to shocked to realize who was sitting in my living room. Yugi was asleep in his lap, head nestled into Yami's chest. I sat, staring, still horrified.  
  
"what is wrong with him?" Yami finally asked.  
  
"if I knew," I began, but trailed off, I did know, it was my fault. Now, I have never been one to feel bad for my actions, never felt much guilt, but for this, it was more like shame, shame for Ryou. He disgusted me, and I knew I was almost staring myself in the mirror when I looked at that little innocent one, standing and abusing his friends in the middle of the street.  
  
"we should leave him there, he's beyond reach," Yami said, almost scornfully, pulling his light closer.  
  
"leave him! Not on your life pharaoh! What if I told you the same about Yugi!" I may have been ashamed of my light, disgusted by him, but firstly, he wasn't a lost cause if I could help it, and I wasn't going to be ordered around by the pharaoh.  
  
"I'm sorry Bakura, I shouldn't have spoken,"  
  
"no, you shouldn't have," I grumbled, a little unnerved by the apology.  
  
"well, I think it's time for us to go," Yami stood up and, carrying Yugi in his arms left me sitting there.  
  
Once the door had slammed I kicked a vase, making it fly into the wall and shatter. I screamed into the silence.  
  
"Ryou! You bastard! Why did you go and do this! What the hell was the point!" I hated him, but I couldn't, because he was me, almost entirely. I wanted to kill him, but in a way, He was so like me that it disturbed me. Damn it Ryou! Will you just make up your mind!  
  
*why'd you have to go and make things so complicated  
  
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else  
  
Gets me frusterated  
  
And life's like this, and you  
  
You fall and you crawl and you break and you take  
  
What you get and turn it into  
  
Honestly, you promised me  
  
I'm never going to find you fake it  
  
No no no  
  
No no  
  
No no no*  
  
A week later I opened the door, and got the shock and probably the biggest laugh of my life. It was Ryou, but he was different. His hair was dirty, his face was to, but his clothes had changed. He was ow in a pair of torn jeans, that looked like garbage and a torn black tanktop. It might have been hot except for the cigarett dangling idiotically from his lips. He looked like a groupy.  
  
"what do you want," I asked scornfully, still not ready to completely forgive him.  
  
"I need money," he growled at me, apparently attempting to be frightening, but only succeeding in making me laugh.  
  
"so, not so easy to live on your own, is it?" he sighed and leaned up against the door, staring at me through bored and slightly glazed eyes.  
  
"it's fine, just need a little money," then, as he spoke I smelled the alchohal on his breath and flinched.  
  
"well, I really don't want ot give it to you," I said, trying to keep a smile on my face, but failing. He suddenly stood up and his eyes were wild. The tank top flew off, in a last ditch attempt to make me understand that he wasn't a little kid anymore.  
  
"will you just give me the fucking money!" I turned abruptly, grabbed about a quarter of the money from the stash his father had sent and slammed it into his hands.  
  
"there, take it and get out of here," I growled at him and he left, weaving slightly as I slammed the door.  
  
*you come, over unannounced  
  
dressed up, like you're someone else  
  
where you are and where it's sad to see, you're makin me  
  
laugh out, when you strike your pose  
  
take off, all your preppy clothes  
  
you know, you're not fooling anyone  
  
when you become  
  
somebody else  
  
round everyone else  
  
watching your back  
  
like youcan't relax  
  
tryin to be cool  
  
you look like a fool to me*  
  
This put a new twist on things. Not only had Ryou turned into a crueler versin of me, he drank too? Well, I would have to figure out what to do. Despite what they all thought, I wasn't about to let my hikari go to the dumps, just for independence. I decided to go for a walk to clear my head. I slipped out of the door and began to walk.  
  
I was surprised where my feet took me. Back down to Ryou's apartment building. I had to stop coming here, if I ever wanted him back, but I was curious, and almost felt pity for the boy. He had moved out here, trying to find ndependence, but instead had found that it was hard. I was afraid for him. If it had taken him five days to fall into alcohal, how lng before that cigarette was replaced with weed, or crack. I had to find him, talk to him. I didn't know where he lived, so I walked in, slouching the best I could and walked up to a greasy looking guy in the lobby.  
  
"I need the apartment of Ry...Morotu," the guy shrugged and pointed to a list of people and their rooms on the wall. Ryou's was at the top. I trudged up the stairs, almost sick. The place smelled like piss and grease. I wondered how Ryou stood it.  
  
When I finally found his apartment I knocked, but there was no answer, just a moan. I tried the knob and found it unlocked. The door swung open and I saw Ryou, but he didn't have those torn jeans on, or anything for that matter, and he wasn't alone.  
  
"you bastard!" I screamed at him.  
  
*why'd you have to go and make things so complicated  
  
I see the way yoou're acting like somebody else  
  
Makes me frusterated  
  
And life's like this, well you,  
  
You fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get  
  
And turn it into  
  
Honestly, you promised me  
  
I'm never going o find you fake it  
  
No no no  
  
No no  
  
No no no*  
  
Ryou shot off the bed where he lay, next to a girl who I couldn't be sure was alive, but the smell of beer was strong in the place.  
  
"what are you doing here!" he screamed at me.  
  
"Ryou I," but I didn't get to finish, he flung a vase at my head and I ducked, letting it smash against the wall.  
  
"get out!" he screamed at me, wavering but flinging a chair at me.  
  
"what's gotten into you!" I screamed back at him, dodging another vase.  
  
"get out of my house!" he slurred, flipping out a knife. I stepped back, he really had lost it.  
  
"Ryou stop!" I cried, trying to make him put it down, but no use. He dove at my throat and I knew he was drunker then even he knew. I ducked, but the blade caught me across the cheek, and I felt the blood flowing as I pushed him to the floor and hurried out, leaving him panting for breath.  
  
*chill out  
  
what you yelling for  
  
lay back  
  
it's all been done before  
  
and if you would only let it be  
  
you would see  
  
somebody else  
  
round everyone else  
  
watching your back  
  
like you can't relax  
  
you try to be cool  
  
you look like a fool to me*  
  
I hurried home, fuming. The little whore. He had no right to do that. He had changed so much, to much. I didn't know him. I ran into the house and found Yami sitting on the couch.  
  
"What are you doing here?" I asked, noticing that I had left the door open.  
  
"Bakura! What happened to your face?" he was staring at me and I tok a quick look in the mirror abuv the fireplace. The left side of my face was covered in blood and the gash was already starting to swell.  
  
"that, was from my hikari," I answered, picking up a towel and using it to clean my face.  
  
"well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about, but I don't think this is the time." He studied me as I washed my face, but that wasn't what I was thinking of. I was remembering about a week ago, had it only been a week? Where I had cut Ryou in the same place, a smaller cut no doubt, but still a cut. He was really starting to agrivate me, turning into your Yami isn't a good idea, especially when that Yami is me. He was, and I found that I didn't like what I saw.  
  
*why'd you have to go and make things so complicated  
  
see the way you're acting like you're somebody else  
  
gets me frusterated  
  
and life's like this you  
  
well you fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get  
  
and you turn it into  
  
honestly, you promised me  
  
I'm never goin to find you fake it  
  
No no no  
  
No no  
  
No no no*  
  
He had to change, and if he didn't, my light would be gone forever, then, what would become of me?  
  
A/N: done! Sorry, it's just been a hard chapter to write, running out of ideas, but it came out alright. So, need some feedback here, just like the usual drill, 1 review asking me to keep this up will keep me keeping this up. So, thanks for reading and review!!!  
  
Note: the next chapter is going to take a while, it's not easy to work Skater boy into a fic like this, so give me some credit if I come up with something at all!  
  
Ttfn  
  
Katia 


	3. Skater Boy

Skater Boy  
  
A/N: Another chapter begun! First, before I do or say or think anything I have to give a huge thank you to Yami's tenshi who gave me the idea for this chapter! It would've taken me much longer then this if it wasn't for her. Thank you so much! *Gives Yami's Tenshi cupcakes she made this morning* well, thank you to the rest of my reviewers too. You all get Bakura plushies! So, enjoy, and you can blame Bakura and my Yami for the delay, I have had the worst case of writers block the last month that It's really not funny  
  
Bakura: why is it our fault!  
  
Because, you are my muses  
  
YK: I don't see you blaming Cali  
  
She's new, for the readers, Cali is my newest muse, just kind of popped into my head and stayed there, the usual, silver angel with brown hair, but I suspect devil horns hidden beneath it, but, since you've all waited so long for this fic I suppose I should start it, Ryou, would you do the disclaimer?  
  
Ryou: Katia doesn't own Yu-gi-oh, or these songs. They are owned by Avril Lavigne, and even though she might pretend to, she doesn't own Bakura or me, which I am glad of, but she does own Cali  
  
Thank you Ryou-Chan, now, on with the fic!  
  
I woke up in bed and tried to remember the events of the last night. After I had gone home I had spoken to the pharaoh, cleaned things up and I guess I went to bed. I moved over and groaned, my body felt sore for no reason. Yawning I cried out. The yawn had stretched my cheek and it hurt like hell. I got out of bed slowly and padded downstairs. There was a note from Yami sitting on the table  
  
We need to talk, something has to be done, call me when you feel like talking  
  
I sniffed scornfully and tossed the note into the garbage, if he wanted to talk then he could call me, I had no desire to talk about my light to anyone except myself. "What is wrong with him, why has he changed so much, and why am I talking to myself," I sat down in a chair, rubbing my temples and feeling like I had a hang over. I guess staying up and finding my Hikari in bed with some whore did that to you. I made a pot of coffee and drained it straight and extremely hot. Then, wanting something to do I went up to Ryou's room. It was the same as usual, clean and neat, not a thing out of place. I looked around me and spotted a large black box, with speakers. I had never paid attention to things in this room and so went over to investigate it.  
  
I looked at the buttons and one said open. I pressed it and a flap at the top of the box swung open. I looked inside. A round and shiny disk lay inside. I pushed it around with my finger and watched in fascination as it spun. Then I closed the flap and looked at the other buttons. My eye fell on one that had a circle on it. This looked very interesting, so I pressed t. I loved to look at these new things, usually by looking I broke them, but this one didn't break. I looked at the flap and saw a little plastic window, I watched the little disk spinning and then jumped about a foot in the air when I heard the box start to make noise, it was music, I figured out in about tow seconds. I listened to it while I waited for my heart to stop pounding.  
  
"He was a boy  
  
She was a girl  
  
Can I make it any more obvious  
  
He was a punk  
  
She took ballet  
  
What more can I say  
  
He wanted her  
  
She'd never tell  
  
But secretly she wanted him as well  
  
But all of her friends  
  
Stuck up their nose  
  
They had a problem with his baggy clothes" I listened, fascinated by the song. Sitting down on Ryou's bed I continued to listen to the song, not the music, but the lyrics, in some odd way they brought Ryou to mind, but it wasn't like I'd had much else on my mind for the last week.  
  
"He was a skater boy  
  
She said see you later boy  
  
He wasn't good enough for her  
  
She had a pretty face  
  
But her head was up in space  
  
She needed to come back down to earth.  
  
Five years from now  
  
She sits at home  
  
Feeding the baby  
  
She's all alone  
  
Turns on the TV  
  
And guess who she sees  
  
Skater boy rocking on mtv,"  
  
This song was going to bother me. I liked the tune, and no matter how hard I tried my mind kept relating it to Ryou. He was so alone, but yet it was me who was alone, if I didn't stop thinking about this I was going to pass out. I looked at the screen thingy on the front of the box and discovered that the song had a minute left, so I listened, hoping to put my mind at ease.  
  
"She calls up her friends  
  
They already know  
  
And they've all got tickets to see his show  
  
She tags along  
  
Stands in the crowd  
  
And looks up at the man that she turned down.  
  
He was a skater boy  
  
She said see you later boy  
  
He wasn't good enough for her  
  
But now he's a super star  
  
Slammin on his guitar  
  
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?  
  
He was a skater boy  
  
She said see you later boy  
  
He wasn't good enough for her  
  
Now he's a super star  
  
Slammin on his guitar  
  
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?"  
  
I sighed, this verse had nothing to do with my Ryou, except for the change, he was a new person, but I wasn't more impressed by this new person. I had few regrets, except for driving him away. He was the unsafe one, not me. He had the uncertain life. I laid down on the bed to finish the song.  
  
"Sorry girl but you missed out  
  
Well tough luck that boy's mine now  
  
We are more then just good friends  
  
This is how the story ends  
  
To bad you couldn't see  
  
See the man that boy could be  
  
There is more then meets the eye  
  
I see the soul that's inside.  
  
He's just a boy  
  
An I'm just a girl  
  
Can I make it any more obvious?  
  
We are in love  
  
Haven't you heard  
  
How we rock each other's world.  
  
I'm with a skater boy  
  
I said see you later boy  
  
I'll be back stage after the show  
  
I'll be at the studio  
  
Singing the song we wrote  
  
About a girl you used to know  
  
I'm with a skater boy  
  
I said see you later boy  
  
I'll be backstage after the show  
  
I'll be at the studio  
  
Singing the song we wrote  
  
About a girl you used to know."  
  
Sitting there in Ryou's room, listening to that song it suddenly hit me. I had almost given up on Ryou, let him live his life and leave myself to blame and suffer. I couldn't do that; if I ever wanted him back I'd have to work at it. I couldn't give him up; no one was getting my Ryou. Why was I calling him my Ryou, because he would be. I would get him back.  
  
Only after I had stormed out of the house, filled with hope did it hit me. To make him mine, I would have to go see him again, what would that be like. Would he be throwing things at me? Would he scream at me? Oh well, I had to risk it. I walked down the street, pushing all thoughts of the future out of my head and focusing on what I had to do.  
  
When I reached Ryou's neighborhood I noticed that I was getting a lot of stares from the same people who had tried to kill me before. They backed out of my way and not until I saw myself reflected in a window did I understand why. The cut on my face was turning odd colors and extremely swollen, still oozing a little blood. That whole side of my face was kind of a purplish color. "thanks Hikari," I muttered, hurrying past and to Ryou's apartment. The deskman just backed away as I brushed past, up what seemed like that eternity of stairs and to Ryou's place. I pushed the door open to find Ryou, sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at the mess on the floor and looking confused. It was obvious that he had a major hang over. He looked up at me with bleary eyes.  
  
"Who is it?"  
  
"It's me you baka," I mentally kicked myself, I was supposed to be nice to him, but he was so pathetic and for once, truly disgusted me.  
  
"Bakura?" he looked confused, and tried to remember where he had last seen me.  
  
"It was last night," I snapped. He looked more confused, then got it. His face went pale and his eyes, instantly filled with tears went up to my cheek.  
  
"Bakura, I. I. What happened to you?" I laughed in his face.  
  
"that, my Hikari, is a matter I'll talk to you about later, but we need to talk,"  
  
"Talk away," he mumbled, to groggy to make much sense of what I was saying.  
  
"Not now, I want to talk to you when you understand me,"  
  
"I understand you now, just say it," I sighed impatiently.  
  
"Ryou, you," "my name is morotu," he snapped.  
  
"Fine, Morotu, you are drunk out of your mind, I'll talk to you later, on the bridge by first street, at ten, it's a quiet place, I'll meet you there,"  
  
"But, I don't want,"  
  
"That. Is to bad, we are going to talk, and when you aren't drunk off your ass, I'll see you then, at ten o'clock," I turned and as I walked away I heard him give a sigh and I couldn't not hear the tiny sob that came from him. That little show of emotion softened my heart and it took all the years of iciness to be able to turn and walk away. I after all was still rather evil and could be an extreme bastard if I chose. I briefly wondered why I was even bothering to go after him, why I didn't go back and just drag him home and give him the beating of his life. I knew he would stay. That little burst of anger the day he had left wouldn't last him long and I knew with a few threats he'd come home. So, why wasn't I dragging him home? Maybe it was because I respected what he had done. He had always been so meek and submissive, maybe I was glad to have him stand up for himself, but if he wasn't careful then he was going to get himself hurt, or killed. What ever it was, I couldn't drag him home, that wouldn't be humane, in a tomb robberish sort of way. To deprive him of the will that had suddenly possessed him would be cruel, and I knew he wasn't just rebelling against me, I had watched him hurt his friends just as ruthlessly as he had me. I thought I'd love to see that pharaoh's Hikari suffer, to see the pharaoh shocked, but I didn't think that it would bother me so much, but it had, because it was my hikari.  
  
I shook my head, clearing it; I would sort some of this out tonight. I walked down the street, I knew who I had to talk to. He would know what to do; it might be a little awkward, because I wasn't exactly sure how he would receive me. I had been his other's friend, not his and I knew he didn't like me much, but it was worth a try, he had more of a knowledge of this neighborhood and the people in it, and the rebellion of a Hikari to his yami then anyone.  
  
At Malik's house I drew in a breath before ringing the bell. I waited a few minutes before the door was opened by a wet haired and not to happy looking Malik. He looked surprised to see me there, but his surprise turned to annoyance, anger and fear, a little fear as his brain registered who it was.  
  
"What do you want Bakura?"  
  
"I need to talk to you,"  
  
"About what?"  
  
"About Ryou, about rebellion," he looked confused but grudgingly stepped aside. I followed him to the living room where he didn't offer me a seat so I just stood in the doorway as he leaned up against the opposite wall.  
  
"So, what is it?"  
  
"He's left," Malik smirked.  
  
"It took him this long? Thought it would've taken him a lot less time then this,"  
  
"If I wanted someone to be a smart ass then I would've gone to talk to Kaiba,"  
  
"Well, what do you want? I don't intend to stand here all day waiting for you to get to the point,"  
  
"I need you to find someone to keep an eye on him, you know people in that neighborhood, I need someone to watch him, and keep me informed. I've made some unpleasant company down there already and me going there every day to make sure he hasn't gotten himself buried wouldn't go over well." He smiled, but I didn't like the smile.  
  
"No, why should I do anything for you, you were friends with the bastard that ruined my life," I was across the room, with my hands gripping the front of his shirt, holding him a few inches off the ground before he could open his mouth again.  
  
"You ARE going to help me, I'll see to that, and if you thought your Yami was bad, you haven't seen me when I am denied something I want, so just do it. Is that understood?" he looked a little shocked, a little fearful, but mainly extremely pissed.  
  
"Yes, I'll do it, now put me down and get out," I dropped him to the floor, wondering at the spark of fear that even now crossed his face at the sound of his other's name. I quickly turned away, leaving him watching me leave. I left before I could hear him mutter, to me, or to himself,  
  
"Yes Bakura, I'll send someone after him, but not in the way you're thinking,"  
  
*  
  
A/N: Yay! I've finished it! But Malik's so mean! And so is Bakura! Sorry I haven't updated in so long, been grounded from the computer and had a horrible case of writers block.  
  
Bakura: I told you it wasn't our fault  
  
The writers block was sort of your fault, but I do admit that it was mainly school's fault, but I'm done!  
  
Cali: that's good, now will you be writing more?  
  
Yes! Lots and lots more  
  
Ryou: shouldn't you finish talking to the readers now?  
  
Oh yes, Well, you got the next chapter. I assume you'll guess that since I mentioned the bridge you all know what song is next, well, if you haven't heard the song it's "I'm With You," so, I'll get that up ASAP, and Now Ryou is going to finish this for me so I can go hunt down some sugar.  
  
Ryou: Review!  
  
(Two hours later)  
  
Thanks, oh, and you all know the drill *stares at pixy sticks she found on her sugar raid* one review will get the next chapter, and more then that will get the next chapter faster, and every reviewer gets a Bakura plushy.  
  
Ttfn  
  
Katia 


	4. I'm With You

I'm With You  
  
A/N: alright, I thought that I was going to switch off POV's during this story, make Ryou have his songs, but incase anyone's wondering, this will all be in Bakura's point of view unless I decide differently. Well, for once I have nothing more to say, so Ryou, the disclaimer?  
  
Ryou: Katia doesn't own Yu-gi-oh, or these songs. They belong to Avril Lavigne  
  
Good job, well, on with the fic!  
  
Bakura: aren't you forgetting something?  
  
What?  
  
Bakura: you seriously don't remember?  
  
What am I supposed to remember!  
  
Cali: your contest?  
  
Oh yah! *slaps herself in the forehead* the contest, alright, sinceI don't know how many of you look at my bio I'm going to post the two contests I have going here.  
  
Contest 1: Handle This  
  
Ok, most of you have heard the song "handle this" by sum-41, well, my friend said she could make it into a song fic with Yu-gi-oh, but she didn't succeed, so I'm throwing it out there for all of you,  
  
Here are the rules  
  
it has to make some sense  
  
it has to be at least 2 pages  
  
it can be either angst, romance or humor, I don't care what kind of couples you use  
  
have fun with it!  
  
The winner will have it posted, and depending on how many I get I may post more then one, so, good luck!  
  
If you need lyrics email me at splashgirl@usfamily.net. There's one more but I'll give that to you at the end.  
  
()()()()()()(  
  
I walked down the dark street, all alone. No one in their right mind would be out in this neighborhood after dark. Unfortunately, I was out of my right mind and so here I was, in this neighborhood after dark. I hurried through an ally, my senses alert for any sounds. I didn't trust anyone down here. My face probably helped me a little, that and my ragged and no money on me appearance. I came out of the ally and walked down First Street to the bridge. Ryou should be there by now. I knew he would be, even if he had left I knew that he wouldn't disobey me that far. I arrived but he wasn't there. I suspected that he would be there soon, so I just leaned back and waited. I looked down at the black water and shivered. The water in Egypt hadn't been like this, even at night. In my memories, the river had been a beautiful silver in the moonlight, looking pure and fresh and open. This water was black and oily, dark and mysterious. I didn't like it.  
  
An hour later I began to worry. Ryou wasn't one to be late, so unless he had completely forgotten then he should be here by now. I shivered in the night wind and drew my knees up to my chest. I stuck one hand in the water. I had never done this, and expected the water to be as greasy and cold as it looked. It was cold, freezing, but it wasn't greasy, and it felt almost nice. I lifted my hand out and watched the droplets splatter onto the cement of the bridge where I still waited.  
  
*Standin on the bridge  
  
Waiting in the dark  
  
I thought that you'd be here by now  
  
There's nothing but the rain  
  
No footsteps on the ground  
  
I'm listening but there's no sound  
  
Isn't anyone trying to find me  
  
Won't somebody come take me home*  
  
I shivered again as one of the droplets landed on my pants and instantly went through. The night was so incredibly freezing and I was getting tired of waiting. I decided to give my mind some focus. I started thinking of how nice it was going to be o have someone look out for Ryou, to have news of him. If I had that then I could stop worrying. I thought about this, and other things, such as why was it so unbelievably cold out here in June, for another hour. It was midnight and I was getting sick of waiting. I got up, it was bout time to go to Ryou's apartment, but I had some doubts, last time I had gone there at around this time I had found him drunk and in bed with someone, he was only seventeen for Ra's sake. I started off for the apartment.  
  
*It's a damn cold night  
  
Trying to figure out this life  
  
Won't you take me by the hand take me somewhere new  
  
I don't know who you are  
  
But I...I'm with you  
  
I'm with you*  
  
For the second time that day I rushed past the deskman who just nodded at me and ran up the stairs. I reached Ryou's apartment and stood outside, listening for any noise. My blood went cold with fury as I heard a moan from the other side. If I found him with another girl I'll kill him. I was about to run through the door, fists raised when the moan was followed by a sob. Now I was afraid. I took a deep breath and pushed the door open.  
  
When my eyes adjusted to the darkness I almost stepped back, which I never did. My Hikari was laying on the floor, there was blood around him and his face was stained with tears. I rushed forward and rolled him onto his back.  
  
"Ryou? Can you hear me?" he opened tightly shut eyes, saw me, winced and shut them again.  
  
"Bakura?" He sounded weak.  
  
"Yes, it's me, what happened?" He didn't say anything, so I gently checked him over. His chest was covered with small cuts and his face was almost completely black and blue from bruises and angry cuts that rose all over it. His white hair was streaked with crimson from a cut across his forehead. I did something I never thought I could do. I sat down next to him and pulled him into my lap, letting him lean up against me, then I tried again." what happened?" he didn't say anything, just groaned and whimpered. he leaned his face against my shirt and cried harder than I'd have dreamed was possible from such a small boy. I pulled him closer, feeling him shaking.  
  
"What happened," I tried again, softer this time.  
  
"It. It was a. a man. Hh. He tol. Told me tha. That he. He came because you wa. Wanted some. Some one to. To come se. See me,"  
  
"Malik!" I felt the most pure form of hatred rising in me. I jumped up, then remembering the boy in my arms laid him on the bed. "Stay there Hikari,"  
  
"Don't leave me here! They might come back," he begged, grabbing my shirt as I turned to leave.  
  
"May Ra have mercy on them if they do, I promise you Hikari, the one who did this to you, and anyone else who does this to you will wish that they had the mercy of jail," I stormed out of the room, locking it behind me.  
  
Sucking in air I finally arrived at Malik's house and pounded on the door as hard as I could. To my disappointment and rage it was Isis who came down. She looked surprised and a little nervous at me standing out there, fists clenched. She opened the door.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"I need to talk to Malik," I growled.  
  
*I'm looking for a place  
  
I'm searching for a face  
  
Is anyone here I know  
  
Cuz nothing's goin right  
  
And everything's a mess  
  
And no one likes to be alone*  
  
She recognized me, and appearing grateful to be away from me she hurried upstairs. In a minute Malik came down, looking sleepy.  
  
"Bakura? What do you want now,"  
  
"I. Need to talk to you outside," I growled. He smiled and walked outside. I walked around the corner, and he followed. When we were there I spun around at him and knocked him up against the wall.  
  
:"what the hell did you do to my Hikari!" I screamed.  
  
"Nothing," he smirked at my obvious anger.  
  
"Malik Ishtar! If you do not tell me then you will wish that you had your other back!" he looked almost shocked at my anger.  
  
"Alright, I had a friend of mine rough him up a little, that's what you get for helping that bastard ruin my life!"  
  
"Well, he did more then rough him up,"  
  
"What do you mean?" I grabbed his arm and began to drag him along behind me. He ran to keep from tripping.  
  
"You, are going to see what I mean," I ran down the street until I reached the apartments. Then I dragged him up the stairs and burst through the door. Ryou flinched and tucked his head, but he was looking a little delirious.  
  
"Do you see!" I screamed at Malik "do you see what they did to him! You are mad at me! Not my Hikari!" Malik went pale and his eyes were large.  
  
"I. I had no idea they would take me this seriously,"  
  
"You had no idea! You probably told them to do this!"  
  
"No," I turned on him, eyes blazing  
  
"No? Why should I believe you,"  
  
"because, it was Marik," he shivered at the name, "it was Marik who had people hurt like this, it was Marik who ruined people's lives, not me, I will hurt people for revenge, but not like this, not so badly,"  
  
"you can't blame this on your other! He isn't here, it was you!"  
  
"that's not what I meant, I meant that I never do things like this, that was always him, he messed up everyone's life, I'm not supposed o be like that," he muttered himself intoa thoughtful s9ilence.  
  
"sometimes," I said, gesturing at the boy on the bed, "the other half has more influence then one realizes,"  
  
"how did it get this bad," he walked slowly towards Ryou who flinched and tried to role away. He put a gentle hand on the boy's shoulder and made him face him.  
  
"Ryou?"  
  
"Don't hurt me," Ryou begged in a small voice.  
  
"I, I'm not going to do anything, I'm going to say that I'm sorry, none of this was supposed to happen, not like this, a Hikari shouldn't hurt a Hikari." He touched the cut on Ryou's forehead lightly and the smaller boy winced.  
  
"Is he going to be alright?" I asked softly. Malik had been studying him for about five minutes while Ryou had lain still, except for the fact that he was shivering, with fear or cold, I had no idea. He didn't have a shirt on, so he must be cold.  
  
"I think so, he's pretty banged up, but he's going to be ok," he got up and headed for the door and I began to follow.  
  
"Don't go!" Ryou begged me again, looking so afraid that I would leave that he was still shaking.  
  
"I don't know who you are anymore Hikari, but I'm not going anywhere," I said, walking back over and putting the blanket over him. Then I gently rubbed his back as he slowly but surely stopped whimpering and fell asleep.  
  
*It's a damn cold night  
  
Trying to figure out this life  
  
Won't you take me by the hand take me somewhere new  
  
I don't know who you are  
  
But I know  
  
I'm with you...I'm with you*  
  
After about ten minutes of this I looked up and saw that Malik was still standing by the door.  
  
"What do you want ," I snapped at him.  
  
"Bakura, I need to apologize to you, I am a jack ass, but not like this, I won't be able to leave until I get that from you,"  
  
"And why do you care what I think?"  
  
"Because, what you did and what I did are on completely different levels, I have hurt you much more then you have ever done to me, and for that I owe you an apology, and I am not leaving until my debt has been paid, or at least part of it, I will send someone to actually watch him, I may even do it myself,"  
  
"Like I would trust you," he walked forward and stared me directly in the eye.  
  
"Believe me, Like I said, a Hikari doesn't hurt another hikari." I wouldn't have believed him, except for the fact that he was staring me in the eye so directly and with so much humiliation that I think I almost smiled.  
  
"Alright, I except your offer, but you should go home tonight, Isis will be worried and you need sleep, you can start protecting my light from people like yourself tomorrow," He flinched at the insult but nodded and left.  
  
I stared down at my sleeping Hikari, I could just pick him up, take him home, but I couldn't. Besides the fact that he probably wouldn't remember this, and the other fact that he would hate me I just couldn't do it. It felt like cheating. I smacked myself in the forehead, why was I passing up all these opportunities?  
  
*yah yah, why is everything so confusing  
  
Maybe I'm just out of my mind  
  
Yah yah yah  
  
Yah yah yah  
  
yah yah yah yah*  
  
I smiled down atRyou, brushed his hair out of his face and turned and left. It was better if I left, forever, or maybe for a while.  
  
I walked outside, folding my arms over my chest to protect myself from the cold. Again I wondered why it was so cold in June, but I had more important matters on my mind. Ryou was vulnerable, and I had trusted Malik with his safety. That may have been a bad idea, but it solved my immediate problem.  
  
*It's a damn cold night  
  
Trying to figure out this life  
  
Won't you take me by the hand take me somewhere new  
  
I don't know who you are  
  
But I know I'm with you...I'm with you*  
  
I shook my head again, why didn't that ever clear it. I kept walking, yes, that had solved my immediate problem, my head wasn't clearing and if I ever wanted Ryou back it would have to be clear, so I had to go. I didn't know where, but just to be out of here for a while might help, and I knew that, since he felt so guilty that if something happened to Ryou Malik would search from the top to the bottom of the earth and in hell and beyond to find me. So, I would go, could I do it? Say good-bye to everything I knew? Of course I could, the only thing that would please me more was to have Ryou with me.  
  
*Won't you take me by the hand  
  
Take me somewhere new  
  
I don't know who you are  
  
But I.I'm with you  
  
I'm with you  
  
Take me by the hand  
  
Take me somewhere new  
  
I don't know who you are  
  
But I'm with you...I'm with you  
  
I'm with you*  
  
A/N: well, that took a turn where I never intended. Oh well, I love that song and so I hope the story did it justice. I'm so proud of myself! I wrote all this tonight, and it only took me three hours! *Hears crickets chirping* fine, don't applaud.  
  
Cali: she is a complete idiot, she's been writing for about five hours, finishing another chapter to another story and then writing this one, and she's been living on goghurt and Gatorade, so don't mind her and review! All reviewers get Bakura plushies.  
  
Thank you Cali, well, you heard her, review! It's going to be a while until the next chapter because I am going to be so busy and since I've been writing tonight for so long my brain is wrung out like a sponge, so I'll post as soon as I have time.  
  
Bakura: you forgot again  
  
What did I forget now?  
  
Bakura: the second contest  
  
OmG! Ok, here it is, contest 2: random  
  
Alright, I am going to give you a list of six random items and you have to choose one and write a story about it, the rules from abov apply to this, except for that this one has to be about that object and you have to choose one of those objects and only one.  
  
List  
  
Penny, rock, cheese, pop can ceramic egg and last but not least...a washing machine.  
  
I'm going to love to see what you all come up with. If I get a story for each item I'll post one for each item, submit as many as you want, if you have an idea for the other objects then you can submit up to 6 stories, it's just a fun idea that popped into my head at 4 this morning, enjoy. All submissions are due by july 25. if you have any questions you can email me at address abov.  
  
By the way! What ever you do, do not send this in an attachment, my computer won't open them.  
  
Ttfn  
  
Katia 


	5. question from the author

A/N: hey, I am so sorry that this isn't a proper chapter! I've had writers block.like major for this fic, and it's not going away. So, here's the question I wanted to ask you, is there anyone who really wants me to continue this? If so, let me know in a review, because if no one wants this I think I'll just leave it alone, or take it down. So, let me know what you think. If someone wants it then I'll try and write it. If there is a next chapter it'll be the real thing, if there's not one in 3 weeks then you can assume that its' done, but even after three weeks, if you want it, just tell me. Now that I've totally confused you, just know this. Unless I get a review telling me that someone wants it, it's finished, because I need a kick to get going and there is no one kicking, and if no one's interested then I'm not gonna update for my own health, so, let me know. And sorry again if peeps thought it was a new chapter  
  
TTFN  
  
Katia-chan 


	6. A Mobile

Let Go  
  
A Mobile  
  
A/N: Ok, *holds up shield* I know half of you are going to kill me cuz I updated this before Silence, I'm sorry! I have to go with the inspiration.  
  
Thank you to everyone who reviewed! You all kept this story going, but a special thank you to Ryuujitsu! Saved this story and is still doing so. Thank you for the cake!...and I spelled it right this time! Sorry about that, I wasn't paying attention. And since you've all waited so long for this fic to be updated I'll stop the chatter and get on with it. It may be a little screwed up, because I was having trouble pasting the lyrics.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
()()()((()()()()()  
  
Let go: Chapter 5: A Mobile.  
  
()()()()()()()()  
  
Malik pushed the door of the Bakura house open to find it empty.  
  
"Bakura?!" he called up the stairs. There was no answer so he went deeper. Still he saw no one. The house was fairly neatly organized, like it had been cleaned. The only things that remained were a half finished cup of coffee and a towel that looked as if it had been used to staunch a cut. That was explainable, since he had seen the scar on Bakura's face.  
  
He went up the stairs and stopped dead in the hall. Blood. It was everywhere, on the walls, in the bathroom, splattered and smeared into the carpet, and a trail flowed into Ryou's room. He reached out a ginger finger to touch it and found it dry. It had apparently been there for quite some time, and some of it looked as if it had been there for more then a month.  
  
"Bakura! Where the hell are you?" he went back downstairs and looked in the kitchen, there was a note on the table under a box of doughnuts. 'Doughnuts?' he wondered to himself, but shrugged it off and pulled up the note.  
  
Dear Malik  
  
I don't know when you're coming to the house, but I figured I should tell you. I'm going crazy and need to take a vacation. I'm going to flit around Egypt, Greece and Persia for a while. You said you'd look after Ryou, and I'm holding you to that. I don't know where I'll be, but if anything happens just hunt me down. There's quite a bit of money in the box with the doughnuts. Those are for if you decide to stay with Ryou or at the house.  
  
Enjoy and take care.  
  
Bakura  
  
Malik sighed and put down the paper. It was just like Bakura to go and slip off like that. He supposed that since he was on guard duty he should go check on the little hellion.  
  
It was about 10:30 when he got to Ryou's apartment building. He opened the door and when the desk guy looked like he was going to give him trouble he simply pulled a knife from his pocket and flicked some rust off of it and the man shut his mouth.  
  
It was a long haul up to Ryou's apartment, but when he got there, panting and tired, he found that his trip had been for nothing.  
  
"Damn you Ryou." He grumbled, turning and heading back down the stairs.  
  
He walked up to the front desk.  
  
"Hey, you know where Morotu is?" he asked, looking as if he really didn't care.  
  
"Down at the club." The man muttered, looking at Malik over his paper. "And who wants to know, you don't look like that little puppy that's been following him around."  
  
"That's none of your business you overgrown lump of lard." Malik said coolly and turned away.  
  
He arrived at the club, which turned out to be a strip club, in 10 minutes. The place, even from the outside, was a mass of flashing lights and a blur of sexual ads. He really didn't want to go in, but if Ryou was in there it was a good time for him to leave.  
  
Opening the door he almost choked. The smoke was so thick that it made it difficult to breathe. He coughed and had started scanning the room when a girl practically ran him over.  
  
"Would you like a drink hot stuff?" she asked, purring at him. She was wearing a tight red dress that barely went past her hips and didn't have any straps and black leather boots that went up to her knees.  
  
"Uh, no thanks." She gave him what she must've thought was a cute pouty look.  
  
"Are you sure? The drinks here are real hot and steamy, just like you." She brushed her fingers down his cheek and past his shoulder to his chest.  
  
"I, I'm looking for my boyfriend." He lied quickly as her fingers went past his stomach and headed lower.  
  
"Boyfriend?" she asked, looking disappointed and removing her hand.  
  
"Yes," he said quickly, relieved that she wasn't feeling him anymore. "Maybe you've seen him? Very short, white hair?"  
  
She considered for a moment and then pointed to a small stage in the corner.  
  
Malik looked over and sighed. Ryou was in the middle of a crowd of boys and girls, who were all tenderly undoing the buckles on his pants. He could tell by the look on Ryou's face that the boy had very little idea what was going on. He looked completely hammered, as well as possibly high. He pushed the girl away from him and dashed for the stage.  
  
The people around Ryou stared at him and one girl waved him over.  
  
"Want to help? You can have a turn too." She giggled and he shoved her aside, as well as the 3 other girls and the 2 guys.  
  
"He's coming home with me, come on Ryou." He muttered. The boy weakly tried to push his hand away, but then went limp. Malik lifted him into his arms and walked out. These people must be wasted, no one had noticed that Malik had called him Ryou.  
  
Out in the fresh air Malik breathed easy again.  
  
"I don't know how you stood that." He said.  
  
"Where are you taking me?" Ryou mumbled.  
  
"My house, I'm not leaving you in this condition alone."  
  
"My apartment." Ryou slurred, rubbing his eyes.  
  
"No way, I'm staying with you and even I won't stay in that shit hole."  
  
Ryou didn't say anything, just relaxed into Malik's hold.  
  
*went back home again  
  
This sucks gotta pack up and leave again  
  
Say goodbye to all my friends  
  
Can't say when I'll be there again  
  
Time now to turn around, turn my back on everything.*  
  
Malik opened the door to his house. Isis had gone out of town for a few days, so he set Ryou up in his room and he would take hers. He had no sooner sat Ryou down on the bed then he sprang up and headed out of the room.  
  
"Don't feel well." He muttered. Malik steered him to the bathroom and held Ryou's thick white hair back as he threw up countless times.  
  
After 20 minutes the throwing up was done and Ryou was on his hands and knees on the bathroom floor, gasping for breath. Malik went and got him an oversized shirt and stripped his soiled clothes off of him.  
  
"Don't take my stuff."  
  
"You'll get it back, but first we're going to give you a bath, you smell." Malik left him sitting on the floor while he got a bath ready.  
  
When the tub was filled with warm water he picked Ryou up and set him in the water, grabbing a bottle of shampoo he dumped a large glob onto Ryou's head and started washing.  
  
When he was finished with Ryou's hair, which had been stained with ash, blood and dirt he gave him a bar of soap.  
  
"Wash up, I'll be right back."  
  
He went downstairs and grabbed a bottle of Sprite and a few crackers. He poured some of the pop into a paper cup and went back upstairs. Ryou was standing in the middle of the room, dressed in the shirt and drying his hair. Malik set down the food and grabbed the hair drier.  
  
When he was done with this he handed Ryou the crackers and pop. He ate a few crackers and drained the glass.  
  
"Thank you Malik." He murmured, suddenly looking older and more tired then a 17 year old should.  
  
"It's no problem, but you should get to bed, you look awful and it's going to be a hell of a day for you."  
  
"This is so, nice, to be clean and warm. Lot different from the apartment." He said as he got into bed. "Lot nicer and cleaner and more comfortable." His speech trailed off as he fell asleep.  
  
*Everything's changing  
  
When I turn around,  
  
All out of my control I'm a mobile  
  
Everything's changing,  
  
When I turn around  
  
All out of my control I'm a mobile*  
  
The sun came up the next morning and Malik roled over. It had been a long night and he ached all over. Must've been the carrying and the drugs in the smoke. He got up and fixed breakfast.  
  
Ryou didn't appear until noon.  
  
"Hey morning glory." Malik said, pushing a plate of food at him with an asperin on the side. Ryou sat down and went straight for the asperin, and then for the mug of coffee Malik pushed towards him.  
  
"Thank's." he said, draining it.  
  
"You look terrible. Feeling ok?"  
  
"As good as can be expected."  
  
"Well, you did regain consciousness, I was afraid you wouldn't."  
  
"Nope, very conscious, and wondering why the hell the buckles on my pants are undone and why I have lipstick all over my pants," he looked worried, "Tell me I didn't do anything."  
  
"Nope, but if I hadn't shown up you would've been having the biggest sex pile in the world."  
  
"Well, thanks I guess."  
  
It was silent for a minute and then Malik spoke softly.  
  
"Ry, what're you going to do now?"  
  
"What do you mean."  
  
"Well, I figure you have 3 options, you can stay here for a while, go back to your house or go back to that little pit you call an apartment."  
  
"I don't know what I'm gonna do yet." The alcohol seemed to have made him a little more relaxed, which Malik was grateful for. He'd seen the scar Bakura had.  
  
"I guess I should try to get myself back on my feet, I'll probably still go back to the apartment, but I need to get some food and stuff."  
  
"Well, I'd suggest staying here for a little while." He nodded and leaned back, considering.  
  
*start back at this life  
  
Stretch myself back into the vibe  
  
I'm waking up to say I've tried  
  
Instead of waking up to another TV GUIDE  
  
It's time now to turn around  
  
Turn and walk on this crazy ground oh oh oh....  
  
Everythings changing  
  
When I turn around  
  
All out of my control I'm a mobile  
  
Everythings changing out of what I know  
  
Everywhere I go I'm a mobile  
  
I'm a mobile*  
  
"I suppose there is something you should know." Malik said, leaning forward to look Ryou right in the face.  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yes, Bakura left for a trip."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes, and it was for you my friend."  
  
"For. . .me? Why?"  
  
"He loves you you idiot, and you're running and it's driving him crazy."  
  
"He,"  
  
"Yes he does." Ryou looked confused, and then got up and left for his room abruptly.  
  
*Hanging from the ceiling lifes a mobile spinning round with mixed feelings crazy & wild ...  
  
Sometimes I wanna SCREAM OUT LOUD ....  
  
Everythings changing  
  
Everywhere I go  
  
All out of my control  
  
Everythings changing  
  
Everywhere I go out of what I know  
  
Everythings changing when I turn around all out of my control I'm a mobile  
  
Everythings changing out of what I know everywhere I go I'm a mobile  
  
I'm a mobile*  
  
A/N: Yah, I know. You all want to know what's up with Bakura, and the last part of the fic was a little rushed, but I wanted to finish the chapter before I lost my urge to write. I hope it was worth the wait, and the next update won't take as long at all.  
  
TTFN  
  
Katia-chan 


End file.
